If I ever had to write a personalised rendition of The Sound of Music’s “Favourite Things”, I’m not sure I’d want to sing it in front of my mum. Oral sex features quite high on my list of my most cherished past times and although I enjoy both giving and receiving head, this blog post is all about how important I’ve come to realise oral sex is in my sex life and how it has become a big factor in decision making when it comes to finding somebody to settle down with.
I never actually use to be that big a fan of having a man go down on me. I use to find it slightly awkward and felt almost detached from the action, with him all the way down there and me right back up on the pillows, twiddling my thumbs. It was only when I started making porn that I realised how erotic having a mouth on your pussy could be. In fact, it had never even really crossed my mind before porn that oral sex was even a valid part of foreplay. My first boyfriend told me that he didn’t go down on women because he felt as though he was “bowing down” and that didn’t sit right with him. At the time I took this as Gospel and never asked again but now, I’m nearly 30 and a fucking Queen so if a man doesn’t get down at my altar and worship it then it’s very unlikely that anything further will happen between us.
It seems that there’s always an unspoken agreement in any sexual encounter I’ve had that sucking dick is expected. I know lots of women who don’t enjoy giving head but still do it anyway and yet I know plenty of men who don’t enjoy giving a woman oral sex and so they just don’t do it. I’m not a man so obviously there are probably plenty of guys out there not getting the head remit they expect but that’s your problem. Go elsewhere if you’re not being sexually fulfilled and that is why I am a sex blogger and not a relationship one. Life is too short to not be orgasming daily. Life is too short not to have somebody’s mouth on your genitals.
I’ve eaten my fair share of vagina too in porn scenes and although the act of giving another woman head did nothing for me personally, I could appreciate how erotic it looked on camera. This is because the act itself is very erotic, especially when the other person’s hands are gripping your ass, pulling you closer into their face, or when they moan as they taste you. In case I haven’t said it enough, I’ve had a lot of sex, but one of my hottest ever encounters came at the end of shooting a porn scene. I’d had a feeling that the cameraman was enjoying watching me fucking and so I was teasing him, really going for it, throwing him those naughty, sultry looks down the lens of the camera as I bounced on another man’s dick. After we’d finished shooting and everyone had gone off to shower and sign paperwork, the cameraman was so aroused he begged to be allowed to eat my pussy on the side of the set and so I let him. It was hot as hell and he didn’t even want me to touch him, just went to town on my wet pussy and it was incredibly hot, much hotter than if he’d asked if he could fuck me afterwards because it was all focused on me, like a reward for getting him so turned on.
Don’t get it twisted, I am not a selfish lover. I love to please and I genuinely do enjoy giving head. I just also very much enjoy receiving it, too. To me, sex is quite a basic encounter. Of course I enjoy it but anyone can fuck; there’s something very intimate to me about a man wanting to please his woman and the whole focus being solely on her pleasure. I’ve spent a good portion of my adult life fucking with men who didn’t even want to kiss me, so intimacy in a sexual encounter is now very important to me. Plus, watching a man eat pussy is fucking hot. Fun fact about me – I watch a lot of porn and yet watching actual penetration does nothing at all for me. The main thing that I watch is amateur oral sex videos and they do it for me every single time. Leave me alone, it’s my fantasy I can watch what I want.
To a lot of people, oral sex on women isn’t deemed particularly important – there’s no salmon and cunnilingus day – and a lot of men don’t do it on the assumption that it is “unhygienic”. I always find that relatively humorous, given that I’m yet to meet a man who gets aroused and then offers to shower before we get down to it. There’s not much about sex that’s hygienic and I don’t know if you’ve ever sucked a dick that’s been in tight boxers all day but please let me remind you that a vagina is self-cleaning. Not having a man go down on me is not necessarily a “deal breaker” – I would still have sex with him if he doesn’t lick me out and have done, many a time – but to settle down with someone who isn’t fulfilling all my sexual needs? I’d cheat. There is no doubt in my mind. If I’m going to tie myself down to one man for the rest of my life, he better believe he’s not going to be coming up for air at least twice a day.
So the real question is, if your man isn’t gonna get stuck in for you, could you stay with him long term? Could you envision yourself in a dry future, where his cock is talking to your tonsils weekly yet the most foreplay you get is a bit of a clit rubbing before the real action starts? If your man doesn’t sup from the furry cup (sorry, I know that’s gross but I couldn’t resist) what would you do? Would you forgo a life of sexual pleasure for the security of always having someone to share an M&S Dine in For Two with or would you wait it out until a real Cunnilingus King comes into your life? Let me know what you think in the comments section!